Let me just say that this post is about cursive as a writing style, not Cursive, the band. Cursive the band should exist. Cursive the writing style has worn out its welcome.
When I was in second grade, I spent hours of my life learning how to write like some sort of a fancy asshole with swirly letters that look nothing like their lowerclass counterparts, and for what reason exactly? Here I am, years later, and I have not used cursive, to my memory, ever. And lets be honest, nobody born in the last 20 years even uses cursive.
Now some people may say, "But Josh, we DO use cursive! In our signatures!" And I will say, "No. Shut up." Because when was the last time I made a conscious effort to try and use cursive in my signature? Never. I just scribble letters that look kind of similar to my name. So if your argument is that signatures are cursive, I say no, they are not, they are a hybrid of chicken scratch, real letters, and accidentally bumping the paper as you sign it.
And guess the fuck what,
ELEMENTARY SCHOOLS AGREE WITH ME.
Thats right. Remember all that time we spent learning cursive? Well it is no longer a big deal in school anymore. Some schools stop teaching it all together. Go ahead and google it. I wouldn't lie about something serious and life changing, such as this. If my future son or daughter does not have to learn cursive, I will be pleased with the effect my blog has had on the world, because as we all know, I am famous and well respected on the internet.
Now I'd like to address those people who still write in cursive AND were born in the last 20 years. Please do not take this the wrong way, as it is only constructive criticism. You are a faux-sophisticated snob and you want the world to kiss your ass because when you write, it is swirly and often difficult to understand. Well guess what cursive writer, I am not going to kiss your ass. You are the kind of person who sits around and discusses obscure poetry with other cursive writers, as you sip cognac out of a giant class and wear fake glasses. Yeah thats right, I know you have 20/20 vision and you can stop pretending to be impaired.
And maybe you're offended, cursive people. Maybe you're thinking I'm just being mean to you for the sake of being mean to you. Well here are a couple advantages to your habits, just so we can see both sides of the argument.
Thats right! You can magically snap your fingers and make low-res images of the ABC's come up. Enjoy your talents, douchebags.
I'm going to go communicate people my thoughts in easy to understand printing and not feel bad about it at all.
Thats right. Remember all that time we spent learning cursive? Well it is no longer a big deal in school anymore. Some schools stop teaching it all together. Go ahead and google it. I wouldn't lie about something serious and life changing, such as this. If my future son or daughter does not have to learn cursive, I will be pleased with the effect my blog has had on the world, because as we all know, I am famous and well respected on the internet.
Now I'd like to address those people who still write in cursive AND were born in the last 20 years. Please do not take this the wrong way, as it is only constructive criticism. You are a faux-sophisticated snob and you want the world to kiss your ass because when you write, it is swirly and often difficult to understand. Well guess what cursive writer, I am not going to kiss your ass. You are the kind of person who sits around and discusses obscure poetry with other cursive writers, as you sip cognac out of a giant class and wear fake glasses. Yeah thats right, I know you have 20/20 vision and you can stop pretending to be impaired.
And maybe you're offended, cursive people. Maybe you're thinking I'm just being mean to you for the sake of being mean to you. Well here are a couple advantages to your habits, just so we can see both sides of the argument.
Thats right! You can magically snap your fingers and make low-res images of the ABC's come up. Enjoy your talents, douchebags.
I'm going to go communicate people my thoughts in easy to understand printing and not feel bad about it at all.
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